Mind Creates Destiny

This lecture was delivered at the Second Sunday Service on April 14, 2013.

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Thank you very much. I often talk about how important it is to have a positive attitude and encourage people to practice the use of positive words such as “I am a child of God. I am happy, healthy and wealthy. Only good things come my way.” I’d like to emphasize the importance of practicing reciting good words before going to bed and just after waking up along with Shinsokan Meditation. You have to know that positive words have power to create and shape our positive destinies. So I read Open The Doors Of Your Life, Children’s Prayer, and For Young People every day both English and Japanese with my family before Shinsokan Meditation. However, positive words are not only written in books but include our thoughts, utterances, actions and expressions. Why can positive words create and shape a positive destiny? Because the law of the mind permeates the universe. One of the very important laws of the mind is that what you recognize appears. Therefore, by learning this law of the mind and applying the power of the word we will be able to realize what we recognize in our minds.

There is a parking garage right next to the Seicho-No-Ie New York Center there is a parking building. Recently the building became available for sale. Adriano Westfal, Chairman of Seicho-No-Ie New York, brought me a brochure and said, “The parking garage facing 54^th Street is $20 million and the 53^rd Street side is $3 million. Why don’t you buy this property for SNI NY?” I told him, “The 53^rd Street side is almost the same size as the SNI NYC building. So it is a good idea to buy the $3 million parking site. However, I would prefer to buy a spiritual retreat in the suburb of New York so that we can have a spiritual training seminar regularly. The spiritual training seminar gives joy to its participants. By making people joyful and grateful we will be able to increase our membership. Last Sunday I read 5 minutes in Portuguese during my lecture, and many people were so happy. Although I read, I didn’t know what I said but I was so moved that many people were so happy about it. So I decided to learn and master Portuguese at least equivalent to my current level of English in two years.” Then, Adriano said, “Wow, paying $3 million to buy the property next door is much easier than that!” Adriano was joking, but I think sometimes we limit ourselves by our own misconception or belief that “I cannot do this or that.” 

For a long time I thought I needed to buy a home for the future in the U.S. When I came to the U.S. in 2000, I originally planned to go back to Japan in 3 or 5 years. However, due to the SNI ministers’ situation in the U.S., I was told to apply for a green card. I got my green card in 2008 and at that time my daughters told me that they wanted to live in the U.S., not Japan. So, after retirement I would need a place to live. In twelve years or so my retirement time will come and I would have to finish payment of the mortgage if I bought a house. Until recently I believed that it is difficult to pay a mortgage and my daughters’ college fees and taxes and at the same time maintain a comfortable family life. It is not like paying $200,000 or $3 million at all. However, I was restricting myself saying it is very hard. On the other hand, Adriano said it was much easier to pay $3 million than to master Portuguese. I had misused the power of the word. To put it in a different way from Adriano’s perspective, I will be able to do something more than paying $3 million if I can master Portuguese in 2 years. I have a dream to have full attendance at our regular Sunday Service. For someone it might be very difficult to achieve, but it might be easier than mastering Portuguese. When I think in this way, a number of possibilities unfold in front of me, and I believe I can but be successful. 

Rev. Masaharu Taniguchi often used a metaphor as follows: If your parent, husband or wife secretly hid a $10,000 check in your wallet, you won’t be able to use it unless you recognize it. In other words, it is the same as if it doesn’t exist. Imagine that one year ago you borrowed $10,000 from your friend and gave your car as a security deposit. One year later your friend asks you to return the $10,000, but you don’t have such an amount. You would like to pay it back if you had the money, but you don’t and you are about to give up your car. If you knew that your parent/husband/wife had put a $10,000 check in your wallet, you would be able to use it. Infinite abundance, abilities and power are already within you, but you would not be able to use them unless you recognized them. 

To perceive learning Portuguese and paying a mortgage or $3 million is the same. Seicho-No-Ie founder Masaharu Taniguchi explained it in very plain language. He taught us that man is not a physical body, not matter. The physical body and matter do not exist. Diseases and poverty do not exist. Disasters and sufferings do not exist. They exist in those who recognize them in their minds. When founder Taniguchi proclaimed this truth, those who had suffered from diseases were healed, those who had been in need were saved. However, someone told me, “Rev. Taniguchi himself was dead at the age of 91. How can you explain this?” I don’t think Seicho-No-Ie founder Masaharu Taniguchi died at the age of 91. He taught that there is no matter, no physical bodies. In that sense he was never born in this world and never died. Those who saw him as a physical body thought he died. However, he himself clearly said he was not matter, not a physical body, and he would never die. Our physical bodies can be compared to material clothes. When your jacket becomes too old and torn, you will discard it. Then, do you think you have died? No, I don’t think so. You may think your jacket finished its purpose but we never die. Through our spiritual point of view, our physical bodies are the same. 

I have given so many analogies that I have probably confused you by now. This is because many people still believe they live in the physical world and deal with matter. In other words, they limit themselves. However, SNI teaches us that the world we see now is not the world of matter or physical existence but the existence which our mind recognizes. Then, if we recognize negative things, are they really in existence? No, they aren’t. In the “Prayer in Praise of God’s Abundant Protection,” founder Masaharu Taniguchi clearly explained.

    “God is all in all. He transcends time and transcends space. He is everywhere, at all times, without beginning and without end....I now become one with God, melding in oneness with Him, and receive His infinite life, infinite wisdom, and infinite love. I realize God’s infinite potential, I realize God’s infinite abundance, and I live a life filled with joy, harmony, and peace. All of these things have already been realized in my True Image. O God, Thy will be done in this world as it is in the True-Image World...”

    “I now contemplate the Truth that only the True Image is ultimate reality. I contemplate the Truth that in the perfect True-Image World there is no room for evil, conflict, or discord. I therefore affirm that in the True-Image World not even a nuclear bomb can wield its destructive force...”

The True-Image World is the only real existence; therefore, nothing can destroy it, not even nuclear weapons. However, in our physical eyes we think we see many imperfections and believe they exist. So, we must differentiate from the True-Image World and our daily lives. Founder Masaharu Taniguchi continued:

    “Life may be compared to a stage upon which the greatness of everyone’s True Image is portrayed. On this stage, the drama unfolds in a certain order, and its presentation requires the passage of time. A story calling for happiness does not unfold all at once, just as when a seed is planted, it does not burst into flowers and fruit the moment it germinates. Even before a seed is planted, within it is the original model of its flowers and fruit. And, as long as the seed is properly cared for, it will one day bear beautiful flowers and sweet fruit exactly as depicted in the original model.”

 
So, our journey through life unfolds gradually in accordance with the thoughts and words we create in our minds. Little by little we discover our God-given gifts, and our unique purposes in life which allow us to attain true happiness. Although your path to happiness and fulfillment might seem long, you will ultimately find what you seek. The important thing is that God gives all of us His good seeds. Whatever the seed of life you receive, it must bloom into a good life. Everyone and everything in the universe has only a good seed given by God. 

Then, why can we see bad things seemingly unfold? This is because the bad things you encounter are simply a reflection of your mind. I will explain it with a story from the Bible, Mathew chapter 20. 

The story in this chapter was about a vineyard owner and his workers. The point of the story was to liken the kingdom of Heaven to the experiences of the vineyard owner and his workers. The vineyard owner went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard. He promised these workers that he would pay them with silver coins. They were very happy to hear this. The owner went out again at about nine o’clock. He saw others standing idle in the marketplace; and he hired more workers. When he went out again at noon and then at three o’clock, he did the same. At about five he went out and found some people still standing around; so he said to them, “Why are you standing here all day?” They said to him, “Because no one has hired us.” So, he decided to hire the rest of them. When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his manager, “Call the laborers and give them their pay, beginning with the last and then going to the first.” People hired at about five o’clock received a silver coin. Now when the first hired came, they thought they would receive more, but each of them also received the same wage. So, when they received it, they grumbled saying to the vineyard owner, “These last laborers worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the day and the scorching heat.” But he replied to one of them, “Friend, I am doing you no wrong; did you not agree with me for the usual daily wage? Take what belongs to you and go; I choose to give to this last the same as I give to you. Am I not allowed to do what I choose with what belongs to me? Or are you envious because I am generous? So the last will be first, and the first will be last.” (Matt 20:1-16) 

We will be able to learn some lessons from this story. For example, obviously we cannot see Heaven (the True-Image World) if we obstinately cling to our egos. Founder Masanaru Taniguchi commented on these verses saying, “Indeed, Heaven is like this. Heaven cannot be taken by one’s own egotistic power. A person who insists on his own good will be placed last.”

Heaven is not the place of comparison of one’s own scale of good or bad but the scale of God. For example, imagine that you have worked for your company for 10 years. You considered quitting this company many times, and you complained many times about the company president behind his back. However, this March the president that you had grumbled about many times decided to give you an extra $10,000.  Would you be happy?  You most certainly would be happy.  You would probably say, “I never thought about how wonderful the president was, but today, to me he really seems like an angel.  I never expected this from him.  I am so happy and feel good that he has let me work at this company until today.”  So, you decided to treat your three subordinates who had all been hired three months ago. You brought them to a very expensive restaurant for dinner and let them eat whatever they wanted. When you returned from the bathroom, these three guys were whispering something. So, you asked one of them what they were saying. Then, the youngest subordinate replied, “We hesitated to tell you the truth, but you are so kind to us, so we decided to tell you. As you know, all of us just received a special bonus today. We didn’t know how much you received until you told us at dinner that you received $10,000 and therefore decided to treat us to dinner tonight. However, the three of us actually received $10,000 each. Therefore, we cannot really accept your treat. You are a very nice boss.”

Immediately, your happiness was gone. You were angry at the president again. Why did this happen? Where did the feeling of gratitude go, which you had shown to him president an hour ago? Did you lose something? Well, if you quietly considered your bonus, you would find that your $10,000 bonus was still there. However, you wouldn’t be able to be happy anymore because your mind compared your bonus to your subordinates’ bonuses.

This is an explanation of the law of the mind. When you heard about your subordinates’ bonuses, if you were able to be happy for their good fortune, you would generate happy thoughts in your mind. This example reinforces that our world is created in our minds. If you generate happy thoughts in your mind, it will appear. So, if you could be happy for each of your three subordinates’ $10,000 bonuses, your mind would generate $30,000 in happiness. Your happiness would actually total $40,000: $10,000 and your subordinates’ $30,000. This thought of happiness of $40,000 in your mind must appear in the future because what we recognize in our minds will appear. This is the key to become happy. Therefore, no matter what happens we should be grateful to everyone and everything in the universe.

You might think that anybody would rightfully be angry and unappreciative in such a situation because one person worked for 10 years and the other 3 persons worked only for 3 months but they received the same amount. However, if we see only the current phenomenal world, this world is always unfair. Therefore, we must be able to feel appreciation and gratitude for everything and everybody that we can in order to generate happy thoughts in our minds. It is these positive thoughts, or the power of the mind, that leads to happiness and fulfillment.

What Is Success?

What Is Success?

This lecture was delivered at the June’s Special Sunday Service on June 9, 2013.

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Thank you very much.  Last month we gave gratitude to our mothers, and this month we will have a chance to be grateful to our fathers.  We all have a father and mother, so by being grateful to our parents, we will be able to be successful in our lives.  The second President of Seicho-No-Ie Rev. Seicho Taniguchi wrote: “Being Grateful to Our Parents Cultivates the Root of Life. You have a father and mother who loved you from the bottom of their hearts and raised you from an early age. When we increasingly call to mind the blessings from our parents, are grateful to those blessings and express them in words, we will feel the worth of living and the joy of being born in this world and life power will well forth vigorously from us” (From Open The Doors Of Your Life vol. 1, page 29).

Parents are those who gave us our lives in this world. Since they are the roots of our lives like a tree’s roots and we, like leaves, won’t be prosperous and healthy when we ignore our roots. We owe our lives to our parents. Therefore, we have to be grateful to and express our gratitude to them. Otherwise, we won’t become happy. We should realize that being alive and being happy is different. Without life we won’t be able to become happy. Therefore, we must be grateful that we are alive now. Without our parents we would not have our lives. Everyone who is here right now is alive. Therefore, we all have to express our sincere appreciation to our parents. Father’s Day is a good chance to do so like Mother’s Day.

The Divine Message of Grand Harmony teaches us that “Those who are grateful to God but cannot be grateful to their parents are against the Divine Will.” Therefore, it is important to be grateful to God for giving us His life, but at the same time we must be grateful to our parents who also gave our lives to us.

My father already passed away, so I need to focus more on expressing my gratitude to my mother in this phenomenal world.  Of course I always read the Holy Sutra to my father every day.  However, in this physical world I can still physically convey my gratitude my mother, so I often write to my mother.  You know, we do not need to spend a lot of money to express our gratitude. The important thing is to express our sincerity

Our success often happens because of our parents, especially our mothers. Recently, I read a book, Remember Who You Are - Life Stories That Inspire the Heart and Mind, by Daisy Wademan. The author studied at Harvard Business School and received an MBA in 2002. While listening to her final class lectures before graduating, she was very moved by her professors’ words. So, she decided to publish these lectures for the general public to enjoy. One of her professor’s lectures described a story of a woman who had selflessly dedicated her entire life to her family, beginning at the age of 14. I believe we can draw many insights about the true meaning of success and how we can achieve success through this story.

Sarah was born on a small farm in a small town in Utah. Her parents owned a small family run farm where she had to spend many hours working as a child. Due to these circumstances, it did not appear that Sarah would have the opportunity for a higher education to better herself as an adult. So, what she achieved in her life was realized by her own talents and hard work. When she started elementary school, she was very fond of reading and would be completely absorbed in reading several books every week. By the time she had reached middle school, she had read all the books in the town library. While she went to school, Sarah also helped on her family farm. She had many talents and skills such as sewing, knitting, patchwork, and so on. She was so smart that she skipped two grades, and she was the valedictorian at her high school graduation ceremony.

When Sarah was 14 years old, she was expected to raise the family’s livestock on her own. This task literally became a “job” that took away precious time that she would normally have spent on homework. She had to carefully watch the cows’ health and milk them twice a day. She collected money to feed them, and negotiated and sold milk to milk processors in town. She did the bookkeeping as well. Soon this business became the most profitable it had ever been. Do you think Sarah profited from this money? She was happy that the extra money was to be used for her three older brothers’ college educations.

If Sarah had followed in her brothers’ footsteps, she could have pursued a successful career as a doctor, lawyer, professor, etc. However, she got married after graduating from high school, devoting herself to her husband and eventually having 8 children. Although she had eight children, she adopted one foster child from the neighborhood and her cousin’s child from South Dakota. She was so good at helping her children with their homework that she did this not only for her children but also for the neighbors’ children. Sarah successfully motivated each child to enjoy learning and to develop strong academic skills.

Before Sarah turned 40, her husband died suddenly of a heart attack. At that time she still had 5 children at home. Although she had many talents, her lack of formal education limited her job choices, and she became a janitor. Due to the low wages, she had to work long hours. However, Sarah did not want to leave her children home alone when she was working. So, she worked odd hours in order to be with her children when they were not in school.

The professor who had originally told this story in a university lecture was speaking about his own mother. Do you think he was proud of his mother when he was young? No, he wasn’t. He said he had helped Sarah with her cleaning job for 8 years until he himself graduated from high school. He confessed in his lecture that at that time he felt ashamed of his mother because of her “lowly” job. For him, her job was totally shameful, and he couldn’t stand it at all. It was extremely humiliating for him when people saw him and his mother cleaning public buildings. The professor recounted an especially embarrassing experience in which he and his mother had to clean the vomit of a drunkard off of a public building floor. He couldn’t find any joy at all in helping his mother who had worked so hard for her family. However, when, as a young boy, he complained and go angry at his mother, his mother plainly said without any emotions, “We have to do this work. This is our job, and this is the way we live.”

Several years after graduating from high school, the professor, as a young man, realized what he had been thinking was wrong. He realized that his mother had sacrificed everything for her family, and that this sacrifice was noble and not shameful. He had not been able to perceive the real nature of his mother, but at that point in his life he suddenly recognized his mother’s greatness.

I was very moved by the professor’s story about his mother Sarah, but I asked myself, “Did Sarah really have a successful life?” On one hand, she missed the opportunity to acquire the education that would have brought an exciting career, respect by the community and financial security. On the other hand, Sarah’s children were able to thrive because of her commitment to her family under exceptionally difficult circumstances. Likewise, her older brothers and their subsequent families benefited from Sarah’s “business skills” as a child. I believe Sara’s life was very successful because I think she had a fulfilling life.

I don’t think she thought she was unhappy and unfortunate. On the contrary, I strongly believe that her life was very valuable. The first reason is that her son, a university professor was very proud of her. How happy it makes parents when they know that their kids are proud of them! The second reason is that Sarah had exceptional parenting and teaching abilities. Obviously, she did not become a doctor or professor, but she excelled as a mother and teacher and quickly found a way to support her children financially even though she did not possess traditional work skills. And even though Sarah had to work long hours to make ends meet, she found a way to be with her children versus forcing them to be on their own. As a result, she successfully drew out her children’s special abilities which led to their success. Sarah probably never imagined, even in her wildest dreams, that one of her sons would become a business professor at one of the most esteemed universities in the U. S.!

I believe that the definition of success is determined by each individual based on his/her values and priorities. However, in general, I think the following 6 points from Rev. Seicho Taniguchi’s book, Shinsokan Is Wonderful, can guide our notion of success. Although Rev. Taniguchi’s points were regarding the benefits of meditation, I believe this advice can also lead us to define in our own minds what success is and to find the path that leads to success. Rev. Taniguchi wrote we have the following benefits when we practice Shinsokan Meditation daily:

1) We can recognize our own potential and ability.

2) We can gain the power of concentration.

3) We can improve our creative power.

4) We can develop our own unique individuality.

5) We can have the courage and power to conquer unhappiness and difficulties.

6) Our minds communicate.

I strongly believe that we will find success by practicing Shinsokan Meditation daily. First and foremost, it is to recognize that we are all children of God and have infinite potential within ourselves. If we do not recognize this, we cannot be successful. This is something I recently experienced. Look at these watercolor paintings. These are my recent paintings.

I hadn’t painted for 33 years since graduating from junior high school. There was no room for painting in my life because I thought I didn’t have any talent for painting or drawing pictures. However, earlier this year a SNI member who has terminal cancer expressed her desire to draw out her inner talent in the same way an artist expresses her inner talent, I volunteered to paint with her. I started painting in the middle of January of this year. Once I started, I realized how joyful it was. Because I hadn’t realized that painting was joyful, I hadn’t painted for 33 years. However, because of the continuous practice of Shinsokan, I had the courage and confidence to try it. I discovered a new joy and realized that I actually have some talent for painting. Most importantly, I was able to connect with and help a SNI member in need.

When we regularly practice Shinsokan, we increase our power of concentration. No matter how we might define success, we must apply incredible focus, or concentration in order to achieve success. In addition to this, concentration enables us to develop our own unique talents and goals. In turn, we are destined to become successful by applying our talents to reach our goals.

Furthermore, when we practice Shinsokan Meditation, we can have the courage and power to conquer what we perceive to be unhappiness and difficulties. We can express our infinite power and perseverance to change our perceptions and to overcome our problems. In fact, we no longer feel the tiredness and painful exhaustion that accompany difficulties because we feel satisfaction. In fact, we will likely feel joy when we recognize that we have surmounted what seemed like an impossible obstacle to our happiness.

Finally, we must know that our success cannot be accomplished by our own individual power. Only when we reach out to help, and be helped by others, will we be able to achieve our goals to become successful. To this end, we must strive to openly communicate and understand the feelings and needs of others. Each human being is connected to all other human beings. We cannot help ourselves without reaching out to and helping others in some way. Thank you very much.

Ancestoral Memorial Service (3/24/2013)

Why Do We Memorialize Our Ancestors?

Do you know why we memorialize our ancestors? We are all children of God. Although our physical bodies become old/sick and die, our real selves never die. Therefore, we memorialize these spirits which are indestructible and deathless. Even though our physical lives are over, and our physical bodies are cremated and become ashes, our individual souls still continue their activities in the spiritual world. We do not become nothing when we die. In the Divine Message of Return of the Soul to the Spiritual World it states, “All people must someday lose their physical body, but they do not die. Man is a child of God and therefore deathless. The form of your temporary existence will change according to your thought’s musical score. The temporary existence of all people will differ according to the differences in their thought. When a major change occurs in the form of your thought your temporary existence will manifest itself in another world and your physical body—the manifestation of your thoughts until now—will quickly disintegrate. People call this ‘death,’ but it is not death. It is as if Life has finished the performance of one musical composition on the strings of thought and turned to another.” Our true selves which are children of God will never die; therefore, from the standpoint of the True Image World, death means just an end of one performance by a child of God. He begins another performance in a different time and place.

Human Beings Are Not Physical Bodies

          To know that we are not physical bodies but spiritual existences is the quintessential reason for us to memorialize our ancestors. If some of these spirits didn’t realize that their physical bodies had died, they would still believe that their physical lives continue in this world. For example, classic literature, religious texts and world folklore depict ghosts who continue to suffer from their illnesses or injuries that existed before their death. Since their physical bodies do not exist anymore in this physical world, the sufferings of their physical bodies also should not exist. Then, why do ghosts suffer? Many spiritual communication dialogues describe the condition of spirits or ghosts in this manner. This is because these spirits do not realize that they are children of God and that their physical bodies have already ceased to exist and became ashes. Therefore, those spirits need to be taken care of by others to be awakened to the Truth. Those spirits who have not realized the Truth ask for help from their immediate family members or relatives in this physical world. Through memorializing our ancestors, these spirits will realize the Truth that they are already healthy, wealthy children of God as they are by reading the Holy Sutra at the memorial services. Reading the Holy Sutra is a great help for those spirits. At the same time when they realize their true selves, they will increase their spiritual power and help and guide their descendants like guardian angels.

Two Important Things for Ancestor Service

          We now need to clearly realize two reasons of the importance of performing the Ancestor Memorial Service. First, we are all children of God; therefore, in essence all spirits do not need to be memorialized. However,  some spirits do not realize this truth,  so for the secondary reason we memorialize them to help them to realize the Truth. We also need to understand that there are two meanings of our everlasting lives. First, I already described earlier by quoting the Divine Message of Return of the Soul to the Spiritual World that we are deathless. Just like the possibility of musical arrangements is fluid and infinite, so are our thoughts that lead us from the phenomenal to the spiritual world to continue fulfilling lives. Second, it means our lives are the result of our ancestors. We cannot exist without our ancestors. If one of my parents had not existed in this world, I would not have been born in this world. In the same way, if one of my grandparents or great grandparents had not existed, I would not have existed here right now. When I trace my family back to my great grandparents, I realize that 14 individual spirits exist. When I trace ten generations of my ancestors, I can statistically figure that there are 2,046 individual spirits. Likewise, I can figure, going back 30 generations, that there are 2,147,483,646 spirits. My current existence flows from my ancestors’ lives. I would not exist today if one of my over 2 billion ancestors was missing. Likewise, my phenomenal life which is the expression of my everlasting life is not only my own individual life, but the unique infinite life endowed to me through the stream of the lives of my ancestors. So, I feel deep gratitude towards all of my ancestors who, along with God, are responsible for my existence, and my infinite life, and who provide me with enduring strength and support. Therefore, we must memorialize our ancestors to awaken them to their infinite individual lives and at the same time to show our gratefulness because our lives are a part of their infinite life stream.

          I will briefly explain how to memorialize our ancestors in the SNI way at home. I summarized this service which can be adaptable in our present life styles into 7 categories. (I omitted explanation for the following seven categories. If you need more information, please contact your local members or contact the SNI US Missionary Headquarters 310-323-8486)

1.      Altar:

2.    Memorial Tablet/Spiritual Register:

3.    Period of individual memorialization:

4.    Food offering:

5.     Memorializing spirits who are unrelated:

6.    SNI memorial service:

7.     Procedure for the SNI Ancestor Memorial Service at home:

The Power of Friendship (2/10/2013)

The following lecture was given at the February's second Sunday Service:

In our lives we have several chances to encounter our best friends.  Unfortunately in my life, I have moved over 20 times because of my father’s job and my job, but I made many good friends and at the same time lost contacts and cannot contact some of them.  Friendship is very important in human lives.  Because of my friends and our friendships I have been able to have a beautiful, successful life. These friends and our friendships are the power to create my abundant and fulfilling life.

Rev. Masaharu Taniguchi, founder of Seicho-No-Ie, wrote, “As implied in the statement that man is a social animal, man cannot live without others.  What is particularly important is to have good friends.  Good friends are essential throughout life, but people who are good friends from childhood and youth have the opportunity to discover the good points of each other, praise each other, comfort each other, and help each other. Through such efforts, they are enabled to develop tremendously.” (For Young People, p. 76)

Regarding the friendship Rev. Taniguchi explained the following things in the same book:

1. Have good friends, especially from youth.

2. A good friend will have faith in us.

3. Even with ordinary material success, much has to be credited to the power of good friends. 

4. An important thing is that our friends have an influence on our personality.

5. How can we get good friends?

6. At times the best friend for us is a good book rather than a human being.

I think the first and second ones do not need an explanation.  The third one Rev. Taniguchi emphasized how important it is to have a good friend in order to be successful. He wrote:

“Let us say that someone opens a law office. He has graduated from a law school and passed his bar examination, but he has no contacts. No one knows what his capabilities might be...If he has good friends or acquaintances who praise his talents and ability and recommend him to others, he may in due course become a famous lawyer and come to enjoy wealth and reputation abundantly. Through the recommendation of a friend he might be appointed a judge, a presiding judge, a chief justice of a higher court, and perhaps in time a chief justice of the Supreme Court. In life it is difficult to be recognized just because one is capable. There are such things as influence and connections and, through the good offices of another, a person who is somewhat less talented than the best may still get ahead. That is an advantage enjoyed by those who have good friends.” (pages 77-78)

To be successful, we need good friends, but a more essential thing for us to have good friends is to affect our personality. Rev. Taniguchi said, “As just discussed, friendship is necessary even for material success, but much more important is its influence on personality.  Wealth and reputation may be lost over time but an influence on personality stays for a lifetime and becomes a treasure or a handicap.” (p. 79)

Then, how can we have good friends?  I would like to introduce some concrete ways sharing a book, How to Make Luck 7 Secrets Lucky People Use to Succeed, by Marc Myers.  In this book he introduces some concrete ways to become successful, and he especially mentioned that our friends sometimes become gate persons (key persons) to bring us luck.

1)             Loyal: Become known for being loyal to your friends. When you develop a reputation for sticking by your friends, you win the respect of important people. Being known as a loyal friend shows that you stand by those who help you and that you know how to reciprocate when a favor is done for you. As a result, you make life look easy and you become someone people want to help. (p. 97)

2)           Naïve: No matter how knowledgeable or experienced you think you are, you need something extra to make people want to go out of their way for you. For some lucky people, that something extra is an ability to be little naïve. (119)

3)           Find out how smart others are: A childlike curiosity is nothing more than being fascinated by what’s being said and showing it. Instead of trying to show how smart you are, it’s far more productive and beneficial to find out how smart others are. (124)

4)           Do not expect repayment: When you make sacrifices for people without expecting or asking for repayment, you double your chances of receiving good fortune. (129)

5)            When you become generous to your friend:

a) To be truly generous, don’t spend too much time thinking about what you’ve done for others, only about what others are doing with the gifts you’ve given them.

b) Give when your generosity will build high-quality friendships.

c) Give when people are down on their luck. One of the best times to offer assistance is when people are facing hard times.

d) Giving is important, but so is following up with additional help.

e) Give something else if you can’t give what was requested. (134-135)

6)           Do not count on too much: Don’t get greedy. A big mistake many people make when friends or contacts provide them with help is expecting a miracle. They count on their key contacts to give them whatever they want whenever they need it. The problem is that people put too much faith in too few key contacts. They expect these influential people to make their lives easier on demand. What impatient people fail to remember is that key contacts are busy. (153)

By using these techniques we will be able to find lifelong friends and enjoy our friendship.  If we have these good friends, we can have great treasures better than material treasures.  In my very first lecture of this year I shared my personal experience how my Seicho-No-Ie friends helped me to come to the United States.  Before working at the local Seicho-No-Ie Chiba Missionary Area, I had worked for the Hilton Hotel for 8 years.  In the first 6 years I worked in the Tokyo area.  While working at the Tokyo Hilton Hotel, I lost my father in 1987.  I was devastated and I lost a big guidance in my life.  When my father was collapsed, I visited him and helped my mother to take care of him for almost 30 days. My father died on April 17, 1987, but my grandfather had died March 3, 1987.  So, I took about 4 or 5 days of for the funeral.  After a few weeks, I was able to take 4 weeks days off because of my accumulated paid vacations; however, if my friends did not cooperate to assist my shift for a month, I would not be able to take these paid vacations. When I left the Hilton Hotel at the end of December 1990, I had the accumulated vacations and my last day of working at the hotel was November 3, 1990. It was usually difficult for us to take paid vacation fully, but I had been able to take days off about 5 weeks within 2 months because of my friends helping me.

In addition to this, one of my best friends at that time was head hunted for the new opening Hilton Hotel near Tokyo Disneyland and thought that it was good for me to work with him in a new environment.  He asked me to work with him at the new hotel but I was not interested.  He strongly suggested his recruiter to recruit me to work there with the exact same conditions including the salary.  In this way I was promoted under this great condition without any effort.  The most important thing was that I moved to Chiba because I was able to meet one of my mentors who is Rev. Nanao Yamato.  Because of his influence and support, I was able to work at the Seicho-No-Ie Chiba Missionary Area.  If I had not moved to the new hotel, I would not have come to the United States because Rev. Yamato gave me a chance to study at UCLA and 6 months vacations.  Without my friends present, the Mario Kawakami would not exist and you would not be able to listen to my lecture.  Now, I believe you understand how important it is to have good friends.

Some of you may say that some people do not have a chance to meet a good friend.  In my case as I explained that because of my moving over 20 times, I had difficult times to have friends especially when I was young. Fortunately, my parents guided me to Seicho-No-Ie and I read many SNI books.  They became a part of my life, my philosophy and became very good friends.  Rev. Masaharu Taniguchi wrote the benefit of having good books which might become one of your best friends in For Young People:

“At times the best friend for us is a good book rather than a human being.  Henry Beecher observed that people who read Ruskin change completely after reading his works.  Books are live expressions of the writer and they can give their readers the same influence as living people.  Not only that, books ask for nothing except the small amount to be paid for their purchase; yet they joyfully wait for you to use your entire faculties to absorb and take away any amount of the good things they contain.” (p. 84)

We are often easily affected by our friends.  Depending on our friends we may become cheerful or gloomy, rude or gentle.  If we have bad, insincere friends, we might do bad things without feeling guilty and become insincere.  If we are surrounded by people who delight in finding fault and poking fun, we might do the same thing to others.  If we are surrounded by people who are gentle, tolerant, sincere and industrious, those characteristics will be implanted in us and we will be a very delightful person who attracts many good friends.  Thank you very much.