Let Us Practice Mental and Emotional First Aid

Thank you very much. Today, we will discuss how to practice Emotional First Aid. A couple of days ago, my daughter sent me a TED Talk and said, “This video is the reason why I’m so passionate about mental health and psychology. Please watch it and let me know what you guys think!” The title of the video is “How to practice emotional first aid” published by Guy Winch. He compared our emotional and mental health with our physical health. He explained it in the beginning:

What do we know about maintaining our psychological health? Well, nothing. What do we teach our children about emotional hygiene? Nothing. How is it that we spend more time taking care of our teeth than we do our minds?

Why is it that our physical health is so much more important to us than our psychological health? We sustain psychological injuries even more often than we do physical ones, injuries like failure or rejection or loneliness. And they can also get worse if we ignore them, and they can impact our lives in dramatic ways.

Dr. Winch explained how important it is to protect ourselves from loneliness, heartbreak, emotional pain, rejection, and emotional bleeding by practicing emotional first aid. He said we often convinced ourselves that we cannot do this or that, but it is bad for our mental health not to practice emotional hygiene. One failure prevents us to move one and stuck in the same place because we are so afraid of doing things correctly. Many people somethings think that they have to do correctly, or they should not do. They are so fearful to fail.

For example, if someone who has many resources and experiences than you failed the same goal you may have, you might convince yourself you would not be successful. In Seicho-No-Ie we must have a strong conviction to achieve our goals because our mind has the motive power to work hard our endeavors, to push ourselves forward without giving up, and believe in ourselves.

Dr. Winch introduced “rumination” which one of the unhealthiest and most common habits. This means you repeat negative experience in your mind over and over again. He explained in this way:

To ruminate means to chew over.  It’s when your boss yells at you or your professor makes you feel stupid in class, or you have a big fight with a friend and you just can’t stop replaying the scene in your head for days, something for weeks on end. Now, ruminating about upsetting events in this way can easily become a habit, and it’s a very costly one because by spending so much time focused on upsetting and negative thoughts, you are actually putting yourself at significant risk for developing clinical depression, alcoholism, eating disorders, and even cardiovascular disease. The problem is the urge to ruminate can feel really strong and really important, so it’s a difficult habit to stop.

We all experience these. However, by doing this we use our mind power in a negative way and intensify our mind power to create our environment negatively. Rev. Masaharu Taniguchi explained this in a different way:

Count the things that you can do rather than what you cannot do.

“I am good for nothing!” By believing this we are only aggravating our sense of inferiority. Even if we fail just once, if we think about our failure for a hundred times, we are impressing it on our mind to that extent. Moreover, those thoughts become the cause of an inferiority complex. Therefore if we wish to do away with our inferiority complex, it is best to stop counting our failures and take notice of our successes. (Open the Door of Your Life, Vol. 3, p. 169)

We have to create a positive habit by ruminating positive experiences. This is exactly Dr. Winch suggested. He had his twin brother who had suffered from aggressive cancer, he fell into this situation. Fortunately, he is a psychologist and knew what to do. He said, “Studies tell us that even a two-minute distraction is sufficient to break the urge to ruminate in that moment. And so each time I had a worrying, upsetting, negative thought, I forced myself to concentrate on something else until the urge passed. And within one week, my whole outlook changed and became more positive and more hopeful.”

In Seicho-No-Ie we offer various techniques to break the urge to ruminate in the moment. We have Shinsokan meditation, chanting practices, transcription of the sutras, laughing practice, Mind Purification service, practice the power of words, etc. In particular, when we use the power of words, we use the same technique of rumination to create a positive habit. In the prayer by Rev. Masanobu Taniguchi in the April 2019 Truth of Life magazine it is explained as follows:

The power of the Word in a single “act” may be just small, but by repeating it in the same direction, the “deed” becomes “karma” and exerts a great deal of power. By repeatedly expressing good acts, good words, and good thoughts, “good deeds” become “positive karma” and form my destiny. On the contrary, negative acts, negative words, and negative thoughts, if repeated, strengthen the power of negative karma, and form a negative destiny. It is the wrong use of the power of the Words. (Truth of Life April 2019, p. 6)

As current academic studies show that the Seicho-No-Ie teachings and practices are efficient and help many people. I will offer practices and ceremonies to apply people in New York as much as possible. So, please support our movement and at the same time help yourself.

At this Sunday Service we will practice a simple way to change our negative thoughts and attitude toward a positive manner. For example, when someone causes you to suffer unjustly, mistreats you, deliberately reduces your income, or misunderstand your true intentions, you must not hate him. It is easy to hate the person who did something bad to you, but if you do so, you will ruminate negative experience to form a negative habit. So, what should we do? We use the opposite words, thoughts and expressions. When you have a very hot bath and cannot bathe yourself because it is too hot, what will you do? Yes, put cold water in it. In the same manner we use opposite words, thoughts and expressions to the negative thoughts. These negative situations are only temporary existences. The Holy Sutra Nectarean Shower of Holy Doctrines teaches:

A temporary form is eternally false and can never be Reality./ Do not fear what is unreal,

Do not treat as Reality what is unreal./ Confront what is unreal with Reality.

Dismiss what is not true with the true./ Oppose falsehood with the True Image.

Face darkness with light.

In other words, whatever the negative situation you have to use the opposite, which are positive words, thoughts and actions. When you are in sadness, anger, loneliness, disapproval, complaining, or depressed, what kind of thoughts and action do you need to do?                                                 

Negative Condition	Opposite thoughts	Practice
Sadness/chagrin	Joy	Laughing practice/read a joke book or watch funny video
Anger	Forgiveness	Mind Purification
Complaint/dissatisfaction	Gratitude	Gratitude chanting
Feel condemned/disapproved	Blessing	Pray for others/Practice deeds of love
Feel depressed	Open the mind and accept all and yourself	Being one with nature/ Ancestral Memorial
Surrounded by negativity	Positive words	Read TOL and positive words
Impasse situation	Consign all to God	Shinsokan Meditation

Some people may think how they can consign everything to God in a very negative situation. However, there is no impasse in the world of God, so if you believe in God and follow His will, everything will turn out better. In this month Truth of Life magazine Rev. Seicho Taniguchi wrote, “Become happy does not necessarily mean that things turn out the way we want.” In the beginning it may not appear as what you thought it would be, but you need to believe in God and do your best. In this article a member’s daughter went to her mother’s to help for a month, so she closed her store for a month. When she went back home, she found out that her merchandise, personal belongings were all stolen. Her neighbors thought that she moved. Her mother told her that she should consign everything to God. I will read the conclusion of the article and end my lecture today:

Then later, their area was affected by a flood, but about 8 p.m. one night of the following week, the belongings that the burglars had stolen were found. After one stash was found, they started to find one after another. In the end, everything that was stolen was found. Due to this, it was as if the belongings had been evacuated before the flood and therefore not affected, and they were returned after the flood was over. So, everything turned out for the best. This may be something that doesn’t happen that often, and it may even seem to be impossible when you think about it with a human mind, but these things happen a lot when you’re guided by “God’s infinite wisdom.” (Truth of Life, April 2019, p. 14)

Rev. Taniguchi said that these things seem very rare but happen “a lot.” In my life, yes, it happened. I do not share it today, but when you truly believe in God, these things will happen. Thank you very much.